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Writer's pictureUnloveable Dad - Curt

Back-to-School Parent Stress - You Are Not Meant to Be the Perfect Parents So Give Yourself Grace



Back to School Scaries - You are Not Meant to Be a Perfect Parent Transcript


Curt (00:00)

Hi, Preeti Guess what week it is.


Preeti (00:00)

Hi Curt!


tell me.


Curt (00:03)

Back to school week. Parents, kids, not if you're driving around and you start seeing school buses stopping every 50 feet, it tends not to be enjoyable. But the good news is at MAYA we've been covering with students and parents how to handle school anxiety, starting in new schools, dealing with mean girls and mean boys in school. But what could parents do when they're faced with a situation of...


Preeti (00:04)

Oof. Is that good or bad?


Curt (00:27)

you know, that nervousness and that anxiety that they're feeling from their child going back to school, whether it's a new school or starting a new grade. What are some of the tips you can pass along for parents who may be looking frantically on the internet right now for back to school parenting tips?


Preeti (00:41)

Right. You know, so at MAYA, we definitely stress the importance of parental responsibility. And, we call parents to task. We ask them to do the work. But the other thing that we do with parents is that we want you to recognize that you are not meant to be a perfect parent, that there is no such thing and that back to school is a stressful, exciting wonderful, terrible time. And it's all of these things at the same time. And the most important thing that you can model for your children and also give yourself in return is to give yourself grace, is to not try to be the perfect parent, is to not have some sort of laundry list of boxes you must tick in order to feel like a worthy parent today. You are a worthy parent. You care about your kids.


You love your children. You do the best you can for your kids and you wake up tomorrow and you try harder. We know that you do that. And we're here to support you in that and to also make sure that you allow for your kid to actually have a transition, that you allow for yourself to have a transition. Back to school is not easy. The summer is a little bit of the Wild West. Maybe your kids went to camp and you had some freedom.


Maybe your kids stayed at home, but you went on family vacations and you had free time and you were able to take some time off yourself. All of that is wonderful, but it also means that getting back to the routine is not easy. It means that we have to completely shift gears. We have to...change the way we think. We have to remember what that routine is in the first place, or maybe your kid is going to high school and it's a completely different ball game and you want to support them in that transition, it's a transition. It will take time, but if you do it mindfully and if you give yourself the opportunity to do it a little bit better each day, it won't feel as overwhelming as it might at the start.


Curt (02:37)

And definitely, you know, transitions is another word for change. we tend to catastrophize change and people don't like change. They're fearful, but kind of educating and having talks with your kids about change is great. Change is exciting. We're always changing, no matter what. So there isn't this fear around change, whether it's a new grade, a new teacher, a new group of friends, or whatever's going on that the change itself is cool. And you're riding the wave like a surfboard. And now we have this change coming up in September and just cause


It's changed doesn't mean it's bad. So taking that change, painful sphere away from their vocabulary or looking at it as fearful, is also a nice way to kind of get your kids psyched for what's coming in September. Or if you've started already to school this, these last couple of weeks.


Preeti (03:19)

Right, I have a lot of nostalgia for this time of year. I was in school for many years, but also I worked at universities for many years. And so the fall, the winding down of the summer, the new clothes, the new shoes, the books, all of that gets me really excited. And it's a really wonderful time because this is a transition and it is change and change is difficult, as you said.


Curt (03:34)

and


Preeti (03:43)

But there's also opportunity. Like we don't know what's gonna happen. If you think about the last year in the life of your family, look at all the beautiful, amazing things that happened. Look at all the things that you were able to overcome together and give yourself an opportunity to celebrate those wins. Maybe that's the resolution for the year ahead, is that you take time to celebrate the wins. The fact is, is that you and your kids have gotten through 100 % of your worst days.


That is the evidence in front of you, behind you. And it is not something that we think about often enough because we do tend to worry and catastrophize. And how can you not when it comes to your children? They're the most important thing in your life and you're responsible for their safety and their wellbeing and also their happiness. It's a tall order, but we at MAYA... deeply believe that you don't need to do any of this alone. It absolutely takes a village. The village is your community, it's your friends, it's your family, it's their classmates, it's their teachers, it's the administration at the school, it's the coaches, it's all of these people, healthcare providers, and we also are here to help you. So we hope that you're looking at our videos, that you're watching these resources, that we're trying to put out as much information as we can to support parents.


That is our number one job in life is to support parents to support their kids. And we also hope that you'll give us a call and that you'll come and talk to us and tell us what are the challenges that your family's facing and let us help you help your children thrive and be happy, but also understand that happiness is not a state. I have a friend who told me recently that happiness is wanting what you have.


And if you look before you, I'm sure what you have is a beautiful family and that you're looking to nurture and grow and that you do the work every day. We know you do. And we're here to support that. So Curt how can we find out more information about MAYA and book a call with us?


Curt (05:42)

Just go to maya4life.com That's maya4life.com So maya4life.com all our videos all our podcasts all our family resources are up there and you can hit the book now or the calendar button and have a talk with Preeti myself together Whatever you think you want to talk about as parents or parents of teens or tweens? We're there to help and booking now for the fall


Preeti (06:02)

Great. Thanks, Curt. Good talk.


Curt (06:04)

You're welcome. All righty.


BACK-TO-SCHOOL MEAN GIRLS AND BOYS, WATCH BELOW!




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